based on what your error says.. you need more ram and i think centos 32bit is better to run a mysql-server and any emulator on 512mb ram, some VPS hostings also offer Gui Environment's on 512mb RAM vps.
1. Dedicated Host Options for stability and cost
Atleast a 512MB RAM VPS Linux Centos will be great. you can upgrade resources once you get a decent player like 100-300 and so on..
2. Control Panel Option based on features pros/cons
Flux Control Panel is the most being used by now.. because its more secured? or easy to use/configure also..
3. Recommended Patcher based on effectiveness and customization
Thor patcher.. easy to use and easy to configure as well.. and you can see many free themes to use.. on our rAthena downloads
4. Website host for forums/website and possible Domain name options
For website just a normal webhosting is fine.. but you need a big bandwidth if you add patch every day. so you wont get exceeded on your bandwidth easily.
note: not all hosting accepts connection from VPS (mysql) that can cause .. OFFLINE DISPLAY of FLUX server status..
5. Any other important information that I would need to get my server up and running.
you need to know how you will manage your vps and server .. for security purposes..
and please be ready with ddos attack.. since its everywhere nowadays
PonyVPS's post in change time and date linux was marked as the answer